Community guidelines

A safe space starts with how we talk.

Gotcha exists so people can look out for each other before a date. That only works if everyone feels safe here: the person asking, the people answering, and the person being asked about. These guidelines apply to every post, reply and photo, and an AI check holds everyone to them before anything goes up.

Share what happened to you

The most useful post is your own experience told plainly: what was said, what was done, how it felt. “He kept pushing me to come back to his place after I said no twice” helps someone. “He’s a creep” doesn’t tell anyone much.

Opinions are welcome. Rumors aren’t.

• Say what you saw and experienced, give your honest opinion, or ask a question: “Does anyone know if he’s married?”
• Don’t state serious things as fact unless you know them first-hand: crimes, diseases, cheating, problems at work.
• Don’t pass along what a friend told you. Only the person it happened to can share it.

Protect everyone’s privacy

• First names only. No last names, for anyone.
• No phone numbers, addresses, workplaces, schools, social media handles or license plates.
• Dating-profile screenshots are fine. Photos of documents, homes, cars or kids are not.
• What’s said on Gotcha stays on Gotcha. Screenshots are blocked for a reason.

Look out, don’t pile on

• No insults about someone’s looks, body, race, disability or sexuality.
• No threats, and no “go message him”, “show up at his work” or “expose her”. Never contact someone because of something you read here.
• Good experiences matter too. “I went out with him twice and he was respectful” is just as useful.

Never

• Anything about anyone under 18.
• Sexual content, or any intimate image, especially one shared without consent.
• Spam, ads or recruiting to other groups.

If something’s wrong

Use Report on any post or reply, or block a member. Reported content can be hidden while we review it. If you’re posted about, or something here shouldn’t be, use our report page, no account needed. Breaking these guidelines can get content removed and accounts closed.

If you need help now

• In danger right now: call 911.
• National Domestic Violence Hotline: 1-800-799-7233, or text START to 88788.
• RAINN Sexual Assault Hotline: 1-800-656-4673.
• 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline: call or text 988.
• Intimate images shared without consent: StopNCII.org can help stop them spreading, and our report page handles them within 48 hours.

Before a first date

• Meet somewhere public and get there on your own.
• Tell a friend where you’re going and who with.
• Trust your instincts. Leaving early is always allowed.

Questions about these guidelines: support@joeckel.design